The Beauty of Sex in a Godly Marriage

Sex and beauty are not usually two words you find in the same sentence. But they should be! Unless, you were like me, raised to believe that sex was anything but beautiful.  I learned about sex from my peers and the various rap songs that I listened to. It was believed that if you were still a virgin by the age of 17, then there was something very wrong with you and unfortunately, this view still remains.

I was 14 years old the first time I had sex. I thrived off the attention that I received from a guy who was much older than me. The attention I received from him helped me to take my mind off the misery that was my life. My mom had a serious drug and alcohol problem and although she was one of the most loving women you’d ever meet, her demons overwhelmed her. My sister and I pretty much did whatever we wanted to do. (For more of my story, check out my book Love, Jesus, Sex: Experiences & Lessons Learned)

Why am I sharing this? What does this have to do with marriage? Tons! The evil lie that the enemy wants us all to believe is that sex before marriage is okay and there are no consequences. Even if you didn’t get pregnant or contract a sexually transmitted disease, there’s still damage done. These are the lies that I believed and they almost destroyed our marriage. Sex is a spiritual act, so just because something didn’t happen in the natural, something did happen in the spirit. Soul ties were created and guilt and shame were given a doorway into your life. It. Is. Not okay!

Wrong Thoughts About Sex in Marriage

I remember having a conversation with an older woman at a job I had at a hotel.  I remember her telling us young ladies that we should have sex with our husbands whether we felt like it or not and just endure it. I’d also been taught that sex was nasty and dirty, was only for “grown folks” and that I didn’t need to know anything about it. All of these thoughts, coupled with my own painful experiences as a teenager, created havoc in the beginning of our marriage.

My husband had been taught by his dad and uncles to have sex and have it often. Neither of us learned that sex was a gift from God given to married couples, man and woman. We both had to have our minds and hearts renewed and changed our views of sex to the way that God intended. It’s always so funny to me when I mention in my classes that praising God during sex in marriage should be the norm, they look at me as if I’d lost my mind! This just shows how far away from God’s view of sex we are. Instead of speaking profanity during climax, those words should be replaced with praise and thanksgiving to God for being able to enjoy this beautiful gift within a godly marriage.

Sex in marriage is the glue that holds you and your husband together in the hard times because believe me there will be and are many. It is a way to communicate with each other in a way that mere words never could. Sex in marriage is where we as mere mortals get to participate with our amazing God in creating life! It’s amazing how after sex, you see your husband in a different light. God knew that we would need this LOL! Yes, wives, we do need sex! Amen!

Yet, because we go into marriage with all the junk of the past, all the lies we’ve been told, all the wrong things we’d been taught in the area of sex and intimacy, our marriages struggle. People have more sex before they get married than when they are married. This is not God’s plan for marriage! Sex is a gift that the enemy has grossly perverted because he knows just how powerful sex is.

Sex inside the covenant of marriage is what God intended.

Have you ever thought about what’s happening in the spirit realm when you and your husband are making love? Well I asked God, because I love visuals. He gave me a vision of angels standing guard making sure that our union was not disturbed, spiritually. The angels don’t always keep the kids from interrupting sometimes though LOL! Oh my goodness, if God sends angels to guard our union, then sex must be something pretty special to God. We should see it as the same.

What I’ve found in my teachings on sex and purity and in my own life is that wives struggle with sex in marriage because of guilt and shame from their past, self-confidence, body image, or sadly if there is abuse in the marriage. If you struggle with any of these, please get help. Fight back! Take your sex life back! It is a powerful gift given to you and your husband by our God! Don’t let the enemy have one more moment of victory in your sex life. Fight for it, you are worth it. You deserve it and it’s ok that you desire it.  Sex is not nasty, wrong, or to be withheld.  It’s not to be used as a bargaining tool or feared. It’s not to be abused or misused! It is BEAUTIFUL!

Prayer:

Father, thank you so much for your unconditional love for us, your daughters! You’ve taken great care in how you’ve created us. You’ve given us amazing bodies that can do amazing things and you’ve given us the gift of sex in marriage. Father, I thank you that from this day forward, that my sister who’s reading this will enjoy sex with her husband and see it as beautiful. Thank you that even now wrong thoughts are being cast down, hearts and old wounds are being healed. Thank you Father that you’re giving her a new mind and new heart towards her husband and her gift. Father, I pray that you bless their marriage bed and that they will enjoy it frequently. I thank you for the victories taken from the enemy and victories in this area in marriage. We give you all the praise, honor and glory. In Jesus’ name, Amen!

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Shannon Taylor

Wife, mom, author and teacher whose great call is to teach God’s daughters His truth about sex and purity. This call gave birth to her ministry Savin’ it for Hubby. Savin’ it for Hubby has opened many doors to allow her to bring truth to girls and women from all walks of life.

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Latest posts by Shannon Taylor (see all)

• Rahab, Unlikely Woman of Influence. - May 8, 2018
• The Beauty of Sex in a Godly Marriage - February 22, 2018